I Gave Myself Permission To Be Bad

I’m letting myself speak inside out today about some really not so pretty things. Follow the link and jump on over to The Consilium to read the rest of the story. I’m blessed to be sharing there.   I Gave Myself Permission To Be...

For What God Calls, He Equips

  I had a major meltdown last weekend. I mean epic. I was in the third week of leading bible study. I tried not to feel overwhelmed. I believe God asked me to reach out to women throgh this study, but I became riddled with doubt and fear. I desperately relied on God, but I could feel the vultures circling. I was struggling to write lessons and posts and suddenly everything felt contrived; me-based and nothing seemed anointed by God. A part of me even regretted starting this study. I couldn’t believe for the first time in eons, I was besieged by fear. Fear of being judged. Fear of being wrong. Fear of the responsibility of leading people. Fear of trying to do this myself and get in the way of God. Fear of failing at what I am most deeply passionate about. Welcome the unseen and wounded to where they feel can find love and healing. Friends prayed and spoke truth and I reached out to our church leadership and asked for prayer. Then I was reading Acts and God called spoke bullhorn loud. Moses was educated in all the wisdom of the Egyptians and was powerful in speech and action. Acts 7:22 Whoa, wait just a minute. That’s not the Moses I remember. Moses was afraid to speak and fearful of his past. Moses was scared of Pharaoh and his own lack of power. Moses was certain he couldn’t lead his people to freedom. Yet, God says Moses was mighty in both speech and action. Moses was raised in two worlds. He knew he was different. Moses was born a Hebrew, saved...

Lord, Make Me New

  Unspoken words hung heavy in the noisy room. The ladies quickly connected as we women will do and laughter-peppered banter became music to the lonely soul. But the unspoken could be seen in the dart of their eyes. Will I find a friend? Can I feel safe here? Is anyone else hurting like I am? Do I dare open up? Will they understand? Will they accept me? Can my life really be different? I’m awed at their bravery. It takes courage to show up in brokenness. I know. We gather, because we are tired of feeling alone. We are drawn together because deep inside we know there must be a way to be changed.  There is. God is waiting to answer the questions each as unique as the number of women, yet all stemming from one. Am I loved? My heart swells with hope for the hearts of these women hungry for change and I pray. Do not allow this world to mold you in its own image. Instead, be transformed from the inside out by renewing your mind. As a result, you will be able to discern what God wills and whatever God finds good, pleasing, and complete. Romans 12:2 The Voice Today I was in a black mood even though I started the day with reading His word. I easily slip back into conforming with the world. I look over my shoulder and somehow am tricked into being the person I dislike so much. I become prideful, self-centered and insecurity all wrapped together. The world rubs off on me and I have to come to God again. Messy, ugly and ready to be transformed...
God Aches to be Your Delight

God Aches to be Your Delight

  We sat at the corner table in a local restaurant. Huddled over cold Pepsi and hard problems we struggled together-with life, friendship, identity, value. I tried to form logic from tangled emotions caught somewhere between my mind and tongue. Finally, words wrenched from deeper within me than I could fathom. I just want someone to delight in me. Over the next several days, I was raw. Someone to delight in me. The declaration took hold and wouldn’t let me go. Someone to delight in me. Delight. In me. And there it was-the splinter that festered in every part of my life. Once examined, I realized the hope permeated my being. No wonder I chafed at people expecting me to get things done. My friend said that she needed me. She was talking about my value to her, but all I heard was the word “need”. I callously replied, “I hate being needed.” Are you like me? Do you wish for someone to simply want you, not what you can do for them? I’m the one who works and serves and does what everyone needs and Aches. Often that has been translated to mean to a beautiful house, wonderful husband, superb job or precious children. It can even enter into prayers for healing or reconciliation. Those blessings are wonderful, but God wants to be more intimate. He doesn’t want to just be needed. He longs to seep deep into every part of our soul. There, a beautiful dance begins as we weave our heart with His. He grows love which feeds our desire to delight in Him and with...
God’s Promises Become Our Anchor

God’s Promises Become Our Anchor

I have a saying: “I’m going around the same tree.” I say this when I trip over the same bad habit for the umpteenth time. In today’s reading in Genesis 13, God promises to give Abram (later called Abraham) an inheritance of both land and offspring. But years will pass before the promise is fulfilled. Fast forward to Jeremiah 29:11. God gives another promise to the descendants of Abraham: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ~Jeremiah 29:11 Oh, we love to quote this verse. But remember: . . . Read the rest of this devotional at deeperwaters.us  *I am a part of TEAM365 – a group of women who believe that being in God’s Word every day is foundational to everything we do.  Click here for more info and to download the 2015 reading plan to join with...
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